What's behind your mask? Check out a few tips to help you discover and accept your true self!

Friday: Mindfulness by Miles

FROM THE DESK OF MILES EVERSON:

Welcome to today’s “Mindfulness by Miles!”

Every Friday, I talk about a topic that I find useful in my everyday life. My hope is that

you’ll also be interested and compelled to apply my insights and advice in your personal life and career.

In this article, I’m excited to share with you an interesting topic about self-acceptance.

Ready to know more self-help tips from today’s insights and advice?

Continue reading below. I’m highlighting some of the factors and reasons that compel us to hide our true selves, and I’m also sharing ways to live life more authentically.

miles-everson-signature.png
CEO, MBO Partners
Chairman of the Advisory Board, The I Institute

 

 

What's behind your mask? Check out a few tips to help you discover and accept your true self!

“Know thyself.”

In ancient Greece, the philosopher Socrates famously used this phrase to declare that the unexamined life is not worth living. For him, knowing oneself has extraordinary prestige in human culture.

Socrates also claimed that true wisdom is found in “knowing what you do not know.” This means an essential part of knowing yourself must be recognizing the limits of your own understanding.

Do you take time to know yourself?

While you may have heard the famous phrase many times now, you may still continue to underestimate the importance and benefits of what TRULY understanding yourself means.

For some of us, the answer to the question, “Who am I?” is significantly influenced by many outside sources. So, unless you spend conscious, considerable time understanding who you are, you might end up not truly knowing the core of your being at all.

The truth is, you move through life crafting narratives of who you want to be or what you want to have. As a result, you create aspects of your identity that you either present to others or hide.

That’s why I personally make sure I spend time assessing and reevaluating myself. I believe it’s important that I stay true to my core being so I can live life more happily and interact with others more positively.

Earlier this month, I read a blog written by Chenoa Maxwell, an emotional intelligence expert and founder of the Live Limitlessly hub. In that article, she discussed how to uncover what’s behind people’s masks so they could live freely and without fear of being judged or rejected.

In case you don’t know, Maxwell is one of the inspirational people who rose from the darkness of attempting suicide. Armed with a powerful testimony, she now has her own show on the Oprah Winfrey Network.

Her show’s main theme?

Helping celebrities, Fortune 500 companies, and people all over the world live a limitless life!

It’s no wonder that her blogs/articles focus on the topic of accepting and loving oneself.

Discovering AND Accepting Your True Self

Most of the time, we create invisible masks to shield, protect, influence, or dictate how we want others to see us. In Paul Laurence Dubar’s poem, “We Wear The Mask,” he wrote:

“We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes.”

What does this imply?

Many of us create wonderfully ornate and decorative masks. They become so elaborate and laborious that they eventually begin to dictate how we live our lives.

Everything is by design—who we befriend and love, what we consider success, and how we describe beauty. The more elaborate our masks are and the more we wear them, the more we hide our authentic selves.

In the end, we not only lose sight of who we are but also fail to know what we’re actually feeling.

BUT!

What happens if the mask chips, cracks, wears, and tears?

At this point, you’ll realize that no matter how successful, how famous, how curated, and how fast and far you run in life, your authentic self will manage to catch up to you… and eventually, the fissures in the mask will reveal what’s truly behind the facade.

Here’s the thing: People tend to wear their invisible masks when they live in fear, ideals, and they don’t know and accept themselves as they are. This means knowing yourself requires being self-aware, matching who you actually are with who you say you are, and being aware of how you are feeling.

By being self-aware, you can begin to understand and accept yourself instead of judging yourself. Additionally, when you know the core of your being authentically, you become empowered… and when you are empowered, you become invincible.

So, what are some ways to discover your true and authentic self?

Chenoa lists 3 tips in her blog:

  1. Have your personal “quiet time.”

    Take a little time to be quiet and spend time with yourself. Go to a place where you can listen to your own thoughts, get in touch with your feelings, and know your core values and desires better.

    This could also be done through meditation or journaling.

    Once you create more self-awareness on why you’re putting on a mask and who you can let it down with, you’ll feel more free to be yourself.

  2. Ask questions about yourself.

    Think about a time when you pretended to be someone else you’re not or when you hid your true feelings. Ask yourself:

    “Why did I choose to hide a part of my identity?”

    Answering this question will enable you to know and be your true self, and pay attention to the situations or circumstances under which you hide.

  3. Be brave and courageous.

    Accepting and loving yourself authentically takes courage and bravery. This means living and operating from a place of strength and faith, not fear.

    This is also about identifying what your life’s joy is, then living every day to move towards that joy, whether it is supported by others or not.

    By living your life courageously, bravely, and joyfully, you’ll be more comfortable showing who you truly are.

According to Maxwell in her blog, when you commit to the process of loving yourself and understanding that no one and nothing in the world can take your place, you’ll experience positive change from within.

She says this will give you the confidence to step into the extraordinary life you’re meant to live, be your best self, and live your best life.

I personally agree with Maxwell’s stance. Self-love and self-acceptance are truly important. As the saying goes, “You cannot give what you don’t have.” This means if you don’t value yourself enough, it will manifest in how you live and view your life, and interact with others.

That’s why I always choose to be in an attitude of thankfulness for who I am and what I have; this enables me to see the beauty of life and establish positive relationships with others.

I encourage you to adopt this mindset too! When you choose to show your true self and remove your invisible mask, you’ll be amazed at how people will begin to show up differently for you and vice versa.

Your family and friends will begin to recognize and respect the place of strength and faith from which you operate, and you will move closer to a truly joyous and limitless life.

This isn’t something I only see in my work as a business leader; I am also a living example of this self-acceptance mindset.

I hope you find today’s topic encouraging and helpful!

Remember: Accepting and loving yourself means taking loving action for yourself and your needs—emotionally, physically, spiritually, relationally, financially, and organizationally. By knowing this, you can live an authentic and fulfilling life—by yourself and with others.

Stay tuned for next week’s article!

 

 

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Miles Everson

CEO of MBO Partners and former Global Advisory and Consulting CEO at PwC, Everson has worked with many of the world's largest and most prominent organizations, specializing in executive management. He helps companies balance growth, reduce risk, maximize return, and excel in strategic business priorities.

He is a sought-after public speaker and contributor and has been a case study for success from Harvard Business School.

Everson is a Certified Public Accountant, a member of the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants and Minnesota Society of Certified Public Accountants. He graduated from St. Cloud State University with a B.S. in Accounting.

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